I am patient

Everyone waits. You can't really do anything about having to wait. You wait in line at the grocery store, the doctors office, a red light. We wait for winter to be over, for our broken leg to heal, for the cookies to bake. We really can't do anything to make these things go faster. We have to wait. So what is the difference between waiting and being patient? What do we mean when we say we need to be more patient with our kids or our coworkers? When we say someone is "trying our patience"?

 This quote by Joyce Meyer answers that for me. We all wait, it is how we wait that makes the difference. Are we tapping the steering wheel at the red light? Are we silently criticizing the checker at the grocery store? Are we complaining about another cold snowy day?

When we realize this↑↑ we are more inclined to change our attitude. To have the patience we so boldly claim to want, but so often let slip between our fingers. When we realize that we will still get to see the doctor and that everyone else needs to see him too, we can calm down a bit. We may have to change some plans since we are now running late, but we can calmly accept that and make the necessary arrangement instead of boiling inside and probably snapping at the receptionist. The same goes for our children and coworkers. There is more than one way to do something, everyone is dealing with something in their lives, we all learn in our own time, we all make mistakes. When we can step back, take a breath, and remind ourselves of this, we can see that things can happen differently that what we would like, on a different time line that what we would like and it's okay.
There are worse things in the world that arriving 10 minutes late. Yelling at your kids because they spilled juice on their shirt when you needed to leave won't help you leave on time and may do more damage to your kid than you will ever know.
Obviously we aren't perfect. We are going to lose our cool, get upset, make mistakes and want to give up. But we must also be patient with ourselves. Remember that we too make progress in a different order and timeline that what we might like.
Give yourself a little grace and keep trying.

Summer

I've been obsessing a bit about next summer. I just want it to be successful. I want to create memories. I want them to enjoy their time with us. I want the kids to WANT to come back. I want them to feel loved. I want them to do more than sit on screens ALL SUMMER LONG.
So I've been brainstorming and polling and pinning like a crazy person. I love the new youth program from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I think it's so important for people to take ownership of their development. Especially in the critical teenage years.
I've been working on a summer routine/plan to get the kids off screens and trying new things. I've gone back and forth on how to implement it. Do I work in an allowance, do they just get an allowance and this is extra, no allowance and they earn everything, etc. Still ironing out those details. I'll have to talk with Bryan on that.
I'm going to ask the kids for ideas they have, give them my list and see what interests them and make sure I have the supplies. I think I'll ask my nieces and nephews as well. If they are interested in something the kids aren't, the cousins might be able to spark an interest in at least trying something else.
I've got their must do list for every day

1. make your bed
2. clean your room
3. read 20 minutes
4. do your assigned chore (still don't know what those will be)
5. work in the garden x number of minutes

That's it. Those are the things they need to do every day. When those are done, they will get 2 hours of screen time. After that, I'm still working on how more time will be added. I'm sure there will be a lot of revisions. Especially when things actually get started and I see what ACTUALLY works. There could be a lot of weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth. Lots of wifi password changing. But I'm willing to do it, if it means there are actual memories made and there aren't video games going 24/7.

The categories for them to choose from go with the youth program spiritual, physical, intellectual and social. They will not be required to do any of them. If all they do are the physical tasks, that's fine. If all they do is social, that's fine. I won't force them to do any of it. If they choose to sit and stare at the wall because they don't want to do any of the choices or make up their own, that's their choice. Hopefully they will find a new hobby or two and move more than their thumbs.